Pick Wayne's Brain

June 2, 2018

Smells Like Trump Spirit (A Song Parody)

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 9:57 PM

Here’s Nirvana to tell you why Trump is dangerous.

Smells Like Trump Spirit
Based on “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana
Original lyrics and music by Chris Novoselic, David Grohl, and Kurt Cobain ©1991 Warner/Chappell Music, Inc
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider ©2018

They all got guns, warn your friends
They always lose but still pretend
He’s overboard and self-adored
You know he’s just a dirty whore
He’ll go so low, who knows how low
He’ll go so low, who knows how low
He’ll go so low, who knows how low
He’ll go so low, who knows

(more…)

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May 5, 2018

Who’s Blocking Me Now? (A Song Parody)

Filed under: Parody — Wayne A. Schneider @ 12:07 AM

Who’s Blocking Me Now?
Based on “Who Can It Be Now?” by Men at Work
Original music and lyrics by Colin John Hay, © 1981
EMI Music Publishing, Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, © 2018

Who can it be blocking me their door?
No way! Can’t see their tweets no more.
I can’t see what they tweet at night.
I’m very tired of wingnuts on the right.
All I wish is to see his word.
Stay away, don’t you find it absurd?
Best off if I don’t deride.
Don’t come in, they’ll only run and hide.

Who’s blocking me now?
Who’s blocking me now?
Who’s blocking me now?
Who’s blocking me now?

Who can it be blocking me their door?
Makes no sense, I’ve not tweaked him before.
If he fears, he’ll block all day.
He just crapped and there he’ll have to stay.
(more…)

April 6, 2018

Angry White Man (A Song Parody)

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 10:03 PM

I originally posted this on my original blog, which is probably inaccessible now. That was over ten years ago. It applies even more today to Trump’s supporters.

We’ve all heard them at one time or another. The Angry White Man on the radio or TV bitching and moaning about this or that. They’re never happy (unless some liberal is getting hurt somehow), and they always seem to have this hatred they feel the need to spew at some “other”. Sometimes they name the object of their vitriol, and sometimes it’s just a vague, nebulous group, which may or may not exist. For them, I dedicate this song parody. It doesn’t have to be about any one in particular, you can pick your favorite and I’m sure it will apply. Bill O’Reilly, Rush Limbaugh, Michael “The Savage” Weiner (I hope you know his real last name is “Weiner”; it might explain things), Sean Hannity, whoever you want it to be. I hope you enjoy. This is to the tune of Billy Joel’s “Angry Young Man”. Thank you, Mr. Joel, for providing me with another great song to use. I hope you don’t mind.

Angry White Man
(Original Words and Lyrics “Angry Young Man” by Billy Joel
Additional Lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2007)

There’s a place on the air for the angry white man,
With his working class act and his immigrant ban.
He refuses to think. He refuses to see.
He always believes he’s the best that can be.
And he’s proud of his views and the beatings he takes.
And he whines and he cries as he lays out the stakes.
And he’ll likely be known as the angry white man. (more…)

February 17, 2018

Russian Lass

By now everybody should know that Donald Trump, Jr., met with Russian lawyer Natalia Veselnitskaya to discuss the lifting the economic sanctions imposed on Russian banks and oligarchs by then-current-President Barack Obama for interfering with our elections, which everybody also knows they did. Except, apparently, the now-current-President Donald J. Trump, who says that when Putin said he didn’t interfere with our elections, he believed Putin believed what he said. Trump forgot what Putin used to do for a living before maneuvering to become Russian Dictator For Life. (Do you think he ever intends to spend another day not in complete control of his fate?) Now, Junior claims the meeting was about Russian adoptions, but don’t believe that for a moment. In retaliation for the sanctions, Putin banned Americans from adopting Russian babies. So the Russian Lass was there to discuss Putin’s lifting of the adoption ban if Trump would lift the economic sanctions. And Junior’s own emails reveal that the meeting was set up on the premise that the Russians (who, he was told, were working to help Trump get elected) had damaging information on Hillary Clinton. Though Trump claims he knew nothing about the content of that meeting (or that it was happening in the very building in which he sat), within days he was on the campaign trail encouraging the Russians to find Hillary’s missing emails. And Special Counsel Robert Mueller knows all of this, and more.

Oh, BTW, for those who believe the investigation into the Russian interference in our elections began with the “bogus Steele Dossier,” let me enlighten you to a few facts. The FBI knew what the Russians were up to long before Christopher Steele gave them his report because the Dutch, who had been spying on the Russians and literally watched them hack into the DNC’s servers, told them so. Then there was Trump Foreign Policy Team member George Papadopoulos who told an Australian diplomat the Russians had dirt on Hillary Clinton. This was before well-respected British former spy Christopher Steele came to the FBI with information he independently uncovered showing the Russians were trying to influence our elections, and the Trump campaign team was involved somehow. And despite Trump’s official claims that there was “no collusion” between his campaign team and Russia, the FBI recorded NSA Director-nominee Michael Flynn (who was fired by Obama for being untrustworthy, which he warned Trump about when they met) talking to Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak about lifting the sanctions. Before they were in office. Which is highly illegal. So Trump is lying. It’s impossible to actually believe he knew nothing about what was discussed at a meeting with Junior, son-in-law Jared Jushner, and campaign manager Paul Manafort (who was hired for his connections to Russia, as were many of the people in Trump’s campaign, as well as his involvement with money laundering with Donald Trump, and who is cooperating with Mueller.) Why would Junior not tell him about it, even if to say the Russians couldn’t deliver what they promised, even though they were already doing it? And why would Trump start encouraging the Russians to keep hacking if he didn’t know they were doing it? When Trump claims, “There was no collusion, no collusion,” there is video of him colluding with the Russians. Trump is screwed. And not just from Mueller. New York State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman is investigating the Trump Organization’s involvement with all those Russian mobsters buying up Trump properties at ridiculously high prices. And Trump has no authority to pardon anyone for violating New York State laws. If Trump tries to fire Mueller, look for Schneiderman to announce charges against Kushner. Jared owes a bank over a billion dollars, and the note is due soon.

Now that you have some of the background, please enjoy this parody of Styx’ “Renegade.”

Russian Lass
Based on “Renegade” by Styx
Original words and music by Tommy Shaw, © 1978
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, © 2018


Oh, Donald, I’m in fear for our lives from the long harm that you’ve brought
Lawman has put an end to your conning and you’re so far from alone
Oh Donald I can hear you lyin’, you’re so scared and not alone
Dang, Man, it’s comin’ down to the wire and you don’t have very long

The jig is up, the news is out
You’re totally guilty
The Russian lass with dirt to pass
Deceived for her country
(more…)

December 27, 2017

Everybody Taunts You

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 6:30 PM

I thought I was through with these silly things, but this one was aching to get out. You know who it’s about.

Everybody Taunts You
Original words and music “Everybody Wants You” by William H Squier, 1982
Additional lyrics by Wayne A Schneider, 2017

You think they’re coming for you every night
Such apprehension would call for you to tread light
This POTUS business, you think it’s a bore
It makes you restless, it’s something you can’t do much more

Get outta town, spend our dime on your fun
You never let up, say you’ll make one more run
You never miss a round and you’ve played quite a few (more…)

September 4, 2017

Nefarious/Let The Fun Times In

By now you should know who this is about. Enjoy.



Nefarious/Let The Fun Times In
Original words and music “Aquarius/Let The Sun Shine In” by Galt Mac Dermot, James Rado, Gerome Ragn, 1969
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2017

When the loon is in the POTUS House
And stupid are his lies
Then he denies he plans it
And loves to fear his spies

This is the dawning of the age of Nefarious
Age of Nefarious
Nefarious
Nefarious
(more…)

May 12, 2017

Sign of Your Crimes (A Song Parody)

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 9:31 PM

This is about Donald Trump, of course. I don’t think I’ve ever done a parody of a song that was released just a few days ago. I hope I didn’t ruin this really nice song for you, but if you like it, I hope you share it. Thanks.

Sign of Your Crimes
Original words and music “Sign of the Times” by Harry Styles, Tyler Johnson, Alex Salibian, Ryan Nasci, Mitch Rowland, and Jeff Bhasker (2017)
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider (2017)

Just stop your lying, it’s a sign of your crimes
Welcome to the final blow
Hope you’re wearing your jail clothes
You can’t bribe the court on the way to the trial
You look pretty screwed from here
‘Cause you ain’t really good

You never learn what’s been heretofore
Why are we always struck by hearing all
The bullshit? The bullshit?
You never learn what’s been heretofore
Why are we always stuck with hearing all
Your bullshit? The bullshit?

Just stop your lying, it’s a sign of your crimes
You gotta go away from there
You gotta go away from there
(more…)

April 29, 2017

Presidenting Is Hard

Filed under: Commentary — Tags: , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 1:14 PM

In an interview with Reuters, Donald J. Trump, the man who did not win by the largest electoral vote total for a Republican (even since Reagan), actually said, “This [being president] is more work than in my previous life. I thought it would be easier.” This may be because Trump did not know that the entire White House staff would have to be replaced when he took office. He learned this when he sat down with President Obama after winning the election. Apparently no one on his campaign staff knew that either, including his future Chief of Staff and RNC Chairman Reince Priebus.

So I want to send a great big “FUCK YOU!” to every American who voted for this ignorant, egomaniacal, narcissistic, xenophobic, misogynistic, white nationalist, dictator-loving shit stain on the fabric of our society. Read a fucking book!
(more…)

March 22, 2017

A Nutty Day (A Song Parody)

I love Sir Paul McCartney, and I have nothing but the deepest admiration, awe, and respect for his musical genius and creativity, and I would never dare make a claim that I could do anything better than he when it came to music. But there is one rather small, almost insignificant complaint I have (other than the official lyrics of “Live and Let Die” where he sings “And if this ever-changing world in which we live in [sic],” which can easily be corrected by changing them to “And if this ever-changing world in which we’re livin’,” and nobody would know the difference), and it’s that some of his most beautiful melodies are also his most saddest songs. Take “She’s Leaving Home.” Such a beautiful tune, and yet such a sad, sad song. “Cried For No One,” is another one. I love that tune and yet it’s hard to feel happy when singing it. And the third one, the one below, “Another Day,” is another great tune with such a sad story. One of my personal goals in all these years of writing song parodies was to take one of those sad Paul McCartney songs and turn it into a happy melody we could have fun singing. I hope I succeeded. And I hope I don’t offend my musical idol, Sir Paul McCartney, without whom a great many bass players would not know how to play, and I wouldn’t have been able to write parodies of “Lady Madonna,” “I’ve Just Seen A Face,” “Revolution,” (I’m sure he helped John out here and there) “Too Many People,” “Eleanor Rigby,” “Here, There, and Everywhere,” “The Night Before,” “Another Girl,” and the entire “Let It Be” album. Thank you, Sir Paul, and I hope you enjoy this one. Maybe you could sing it for us and give us an even happier tune to enjoy even more, even if it is true. 🙂

This is a typical day in the life of Donald J. Trump, so-called President Of The United States. Or as the acronym that’s most often used on the internet goes, (more…)

March 5, 2017

Donald Trump TV Star (A Rock Opera Parody)

This is a work of fiction based on a work of fiction which, in turn, was based on another work of fiction. The characters are based on real people who may or may not behave the way they’re depicted here, but it would be fun to think they do. This is also a work of fantasy. The real procedures that would have to take place are different, but let’s allow a little license so we can have fun. Besides, I’m just trying to make my made-up story more closely match the made-up story upon which this is based, which tried to more-or-less match the made-up story on which it was based. You can just think of it as “fake news” right up until it really happens.

In researching the lyrics to the musical I found that several versions exist. This is from the one I grew up listening to and the one you want to go by. Its cover looks like this:
jcs-cover-2

I hope you enjoy it and if you do, please share it with your friends through the various media available. Warning: Not suitable for work. Void where prohibited by law.

                        DONALD TRUMP TV STAR
                           A Rock Opera Parody


CAST, The singers in order of appearance

REINCE PRIEBUS........................................WHITE HOUSE CHIEF OF STAFF
DONALD J. TRUMP............................POTUS, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
KELLYANNE CONWAY..........................................COUNSELOR TO THE POTUS
MICHAEL PENCE........................VPOTUS, VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
MITCH McCONNELL...........................................SENATE MAJORITY LEADER
RUDY GIULIANI..........................................................NOSFERATU
JOHN ROBERTS..................................CHIEF JUSTICE OF THE UNITED STATES
JARED KUSHNER.....................DONALD J. TRUMP'S CLOSE ADVISER and SON-IN-LAW
PAUL RYAN................................SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES
RUTH BADER GINSBURG................................................NOTORIOUS RBG 


Reince Priebus is worried.  He's beginning to think his boss might possibly be out
of his mind.  He talks to his dead father a lot, and he seems to think he's Jesus
Christ.  Reince is concerned about the kind of message his governance is sending.

                    HATRED ON THEIR MINDS
Reince Priebus:     My mind's in terror now--
                    At last all too well
                    I can see where we all soon will be
                    If you step away, the width of the plan
                    That you'll see's clearly all lunacy

                    Donald!
                    You've started to believe
                    The things you say you'll do
                    You really do believe
                    This kind of job's for you
                    And all the stuff you've done
                    You thought was swept away
                    Will begin to matter more
                    Than the things you say

                    Listen, Donald, I don't like what I see
                    All I ask is that you listen to me
                    And remember--
                    I've been a right-wing lad all along (more...)

January 14, 2017

Everything’s Alt-right (A Song Parody)

One of the greatest rock operas (and one of my personal favorites) is “Jesus Christ Superstar,” a story about a nice Jewish boy who went into his father’s business. (A Jewish friend from the development I grew up in used to tell me that joke.) This particular parody is based on the very popular song from that musical, “Everything’s Alright.” I feel bad because try as I might, I could not find any suitable video, or even audio clip, to post so you can follow along. But it MUST be from the original Broadway musical, and NOT the film which sucked hugely. If you use a clip from that it won’t match the lyrics because they sing it wrong in the movie. You know how these parodies work. Can’t have that. So you’ll have to drag out your CD and play along. Then again you should know how the song goes, especially once you start going through the words. I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think, and if you like it, please share it. Thank you very much. Oh, and, yes, the Trump lines are deliberate.

Everything’s Alt-right
Original words and music, “Everything’s Alright” by Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber, 1970
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2017

Kellyanne Conway
Try not to get harried, try not to log onto
Forums that upset you so don’t you know
Everything’s alt-right yes Nazis online
(more…)

January 7, 2017

Donny’s A Liar (A Song Parody)

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 10:17 PM

In case it isn’t obvious by now, I think Donald J. Trump is more than just a bullshit artist, he’s a flat out liar.

Donny’s A Liar
Original words and music “Baby’s On Fire” by Brian Eno, 1973
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2017

Donny’s a liar
Never toes the line he ought to
Look at him laughing
Says he’d like to date his daughter

Donny’s a liar
And we’re all laughing at his bitching
Hating those photos
Oh, they spot his double chin thing

(more…)

December 15, 2016

How He’ll Screw Ya (A Song Parody)

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 11:53 PM

The people who voted for Donald Trump have no idea what trouble they’ve caused themselves. Trump never did anything for anybody that didn’t also help himself, even if it was just to stroke his amazingly fragile ego. His Trump Tower Headquarters on 5th Avenue in NYC has become a Mecca for favor seekers and mendacious speakers, including The Donald himself (as he is [dis]affectionately known in his home city.) This is a parody addressed to the ill-educated, short-sighted, bigoted white idiots who voted for Trump. I hope that the rest of you enjoy it at least as much as they’ll hate it.

How He’ll Screw Ya
(Original words and music “Hallelujah” by Leonard Cohen, 1984
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2016)

Now we know it was no secret chord
That Donald played and it pleased the horde
But you don’t really care for truth now, do ya?
It flows like piss, goes forth from 5th
The minor lies, the major grift
The awful king exposing how he’ll screw ya
How he’ll screw ya, How he’ll screw ya
How he’ll screw ya, How he’ll screw ya

His facts were (more…)

December 4, 2016

Deadly Force Is Not Always Justified

After posting some cryptic messages on his Facebook page on the morning of November 28, 2016, 18-year-old Abdul Razak Ali Artan, a refugee from Somalia, drove his car over a curb at Ohio State University into a crowd of people, then exited the car and began attacking people with a butcher knife. Officer Alan Horujko arrived on the scene within a minute and, as a police spokesman put it later, “eliminated the threat.” That’s cop-speak for “he killed him.” But did he really have to? Was killing Artan the only option available to “eliminate the threat”? You and I weren’t there but, even so, I seriously doubt Officer Horujko had no other option to “eliminate the threat.” And what exactly does “eliminate the threat” mean? Which was the “threat”? Artan himself or the butcher knife he was using on people? If Artan was disarmed of the knife, can one automatically assume he was still going to continue to try to kill people? It’s certainly possible, I agree, but can it be automatically assumed, and therefore used as justification to say that killing him was the only option available? Don’t cops carry several kinds of weapons? Don’t they have batons with which to beat down on someone’s arm to knock a knife out of his hands? Don’t they have tasers? Don’t they have any other options besides guns? And even with the guns, do they always have to shoot to kill? Is it because they’re such bad shots (more…)

November 26, 2016

Have You Read The 25th Amendment?

Filed under: Commentary — Tags: , , , , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 7:31 PM

In his series “The Resistance” (formerly known as “The Closer” until the election of Donald J. Trump), Keith Olbermann spells out how Republicans in Congress can remove Trump from office without going through the process of an impeachment. And it’s all perfectly legal and constitutional, because the procedure is spelled out in Article of Amendment 25, Section 4,of the US Constitution. It reads as follows:

4. Whenever the Vice President and a majority of either the principal officers of the executive departments or of such other body as Congress may by law provide, transmit to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives their written declaration that the President is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office, the Vice President shall immediately assume the powers and duties of the office as Acting President.

Thereafter, when the President transmits to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives his written declaration that no inability exists, he shall resume the powers and duties of his office unless the Vice President and a majority of either the principal officers of the executive department or of such other body as Congress may by law provide, transmit within four days to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives their written declaration that the President is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office. Thereupon Congress shall decide the issue, assembling within forty eight hours for that purpose if not in session. If the Congress, within twenty one days after receipt of the latter written declaration, or, if Congress is not in session, within twenty one days after Congress is required to assemble, determines by two thirds vote of both Houses that the President is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office, the Vice President shall continue to discharge the same as Acting President; otherwise, the President shall resume the powers and duties of his office.

So how would this work? Well, upon returning from the swearing-in ceremony, Vice President Pence and a majority of the heads of the cabinet departments (and it could be the ones still in office on January 20, or even the ones who act as heads of the departments should the heads all have resigned effective at noon that day) could write a letter to Speaker Paul Ryan and President Pro Tempore of the Senate Orrin Hatch (the President Pro Tem is the oldest serving member, not the Majority Leader) simply stating the Donald is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office. They don’t have to give a reason. They don’t have to prove anything. No hearings. No nothing. Just a letter.

Now, of course, the Donald could fire back a letter within minutes (and I’d bet he’ll have such a letter pre-written, ready to go) saying no such inability exists. Within four days (in case there’s a holiday weekend in there), Pence and his department heads could fire back another letter (again, they should have this one written along with the first because it would be needed) saying the inability does still exist. Then the matter would go to the Congress. It would require a two-thirds vote of both the House of Representatives and the Senate to remove Trump from power permanently.

I can only hope the Republicans in Congress recognize the danger of having Trump be POTUS and take the legal, constitutional path to remove him from being able to do damage. He could keep the title, since I’m sure that’s all he really wanted out of it, but he wouldn’t have the authority to do anything. Not that I would be much happier in a Pence administration. Unlike Pence, I actually like women and want to see them have the autonomy over their bodies that men take for granted. That’s even less likely to happen under Pence than under Trump, but at least Pence knows something about governing. Trump does not. In fact, based on his comments on the campaign trail, I’m convinced Trump doesn’t understand how government works at all. He talked as if the POTUS had powers he doesn’t really have. In fact, at times it sounded like he thought a POTUS was a dictator, possibly because a lot of Republican citizens think he is. That’s just projection on their part.

And while it is perfectly constitutional to remove Trump from power (if not office) in this matter, it’s actually harder than impeaching him. Invoking Article 25, Section 4, requires two-thirds of both Houses to remove him. But to impeach him (for Treason, Bribery or other High Crimes and Misdemeanors) would require only a simple majority of votes in the House of Representatives. It would still require a two-thirds vote in the Senate to remove him. But you’d have to produce actual charges and conduct an actual trial for that process to work. And while Trump will be in violation of the Constitution at 12:01 PM EST on January 20, 2017, it will not be because of a crime. Instead, and possibly among other reasons, it will be because he had a group of foreign dignitaries come to his hotel in Washington, DC, and encouraged them to stay there when they visited the United States. In other words, he would personally profit from his job beyond what the Congress provides as compensation. (It’s called an Emolument, and its definition depends on what the Framers took the word to mean, not what it may have come to mean since.) Unless, of course, he lets them and their entire staffs stay there completely free of charge, including meals. Then he might argue that he’s not receiving any emoluments. But does anyone believe a man driven by the lust for money, who campaigned on a bigoted platform designed to make white people feel good about themselves, would let foreigners stay at his hotel completely free of charge? I don’t. And I wouldn’t believe a word Trump said about whether or not he was making any money on it. He’s a billionaire because he says he is. He’s the one deciding how much his properties are worth, not an independent auditor. There is very little that Trump says that can be taken at face value. And that’s one of many reasons why he should never be allowed to be POTUS. Also, he’s a bit of an asshole, but there’s no law against that. Otherwise I’d be in a lot of trouble, too. 🙂

September 30, 2016

Driving Me Crazy – The Passhole, The Zippy, and The Creeper

Filed under: Commentary, Driving Me Crazy — Tags: , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 8:05 AM

Here are three more driver types who seem to live to make life miserable for the rest of us who have some place to be and not all that much time to get there. They are the Passhole, the Zippy, and the Creeper. [The other posts in this series cover The Pacer, Turn Signals, and The Pokey and The Gapper.]

I’ve been encountering a lot of Passholes lately. The Passhole is that guy who just won’t go more than one or two miles an hour faster than the trucks (though sometimes cars) he’s right next to and allegedly passing, but who then moves over once he has eventually passed the truck or ten-plus line of cars and then speeds up! He’s just too afraid to pass others on the highway. It’s frustrating because right up until he starts to get even with those big trucks or line of cars, he’s fine with doing the correct speed for the left lane. But then he drops down about ten miles an hour or so as he slowly inches his way beside the people he’s supposedly passing (but won’t actually pass this week) until he finally gets past the first vehicle in the row. Then he steps on the gas or, worse still, he moves over into the other lanes and speeds up. I don’t understand this behavior at all. Look, if you’re afraid of the big trucks on the highway then I have two things to tell you. First, the interstate highway system was built for them, not you. Second, if you’re so afraid of the damn truck, (more…)

August 28, 2016

The Cheat Goes On – A Song Parody

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 10:03 PM

This is a song parody suggested to me by an Alert Reader at The Zoo named houseofroberts. (Thanks, house.) It’s a parody of Sonny and Cher’s “The Beat Goes On,” and it’s about (insert favorite insult here) Donald J. Trump.

The Cheat Goes On
Original words and music, “The Beat Goes On” by Sonny Bono, 1967
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2016

The cheat goes on, the cheat goes on
Just keep sounding a victim to their brains
Donny, Donny, deke, Donny, Donny, dumb

Commodore was once the rage, uh-oh
Boastfully he turned a page, uh-oh
The branding crap’s the current thing, uh-oh
Tinyhander is their newborn king, uh-oh

And the cheat goes on, the cheat goes on
(more…)

July 27, 2016

Taking a Break

Filed under: Commentary — Wayne A. Schneider @ 10:23 PM

I’m going to be taking a little break from posting. I will be back. Those of you who subscribe, I thank you, and you’ll be the first to know when a new post arrives.

Thank you for your support.

Peace on Earth.

Wayne

July 24, 2016

Of Interest To Christians

Filed under: Commentary, Religion — Tags: , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 11:03 PM

The Christian Post (CP), which calls itself “the nation’s most comprehensive Christian news website” (see their Statement of Faith at the bottom of their About page, showing the inherent contradictions in their viewpoints), published two posts detailing thirteen items from the Republican and Democratic convention platforms they deemed to be of interest to Christians. Specifically, Conservative Christians, as explicitly stated in the article on the Republican platform. [NOTE: In order to discuss what CP says about the platform, I will be quoting from their articles. Also note that I am taking the inclusion or not of amendments from the CP articles. I did not compare anything from the actual GOP platform as passed. And, obviously, the DNC is about to begin their convention later today.]

Staring with the Republicans, CP points out that the GOP will no longer be calling for a constitutional amendment to define “marriage” as being between one man and one woman. Instead they’ll say (more…)

July 9, 2016

The Lies About Dallas

Filed under: Commentary — Tags: , , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 7:29 PM

I was once a terrorist in the BLA, but it’s not what you’re thinking. I’ll explain later.

When large scale tragedy strikes we depend on our media for information about what happened, what’s still happening, and what’s going to happen. But the media isn’t usually the source of the information we get. That’s usually some government officials at either the local, state or federal level, depending on the geographic scope of the tragedy in question. When it’s confined to a single city, especially a large metropolitan one, it’s usually the local police who give out the information that the media gives us. So when lives may be at stake, it’s important that this information be reliable. When such a tragedy struck Dallas, TX, this past Thursday, the government officials giving out the information upon which we relied was the Dallas Police Department. And they failed utterly to give us accurate information, and thus failed to keep the public safe.

Although Micah Xavier Johnson’s motivations can generally be traced back further, what happened Thursday in Dallas essentially began early Tuesday morning in Baton Rouge, LA. Police responding to a call about a black man pointing a gun at passersby and threatening them encountered Anton Sterling, a 37-year-old man who sold CDs outside a convenience store. Though Sterling did have a gun on him, at no time did he (more…)

July 1, 2016

Marked With Fireworks and Celebrations

Filed under: Commentary — Tags: , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 6:05 AM

We Americans traditionally celebrate our declaration of independence from British rule on the fourth of July, but did you know that it really should be celebrated two days sooner? The Continental Congress actually voted for independence on July 2, 1776. In a letter to his wife, Abigail, First Vice President (because he lost to George Washington) and Second President (because he beat Thomas Jefferson) John Adams wrote that July 2 would be remembered in history and “marked with fireworks and celebrations.” But the actual written document, the one we all see, is dated July 4. And it wasn’t even actually signed until August 2. And the people who eventually signed it weren’t all there that day. And King George III didn’t hear about it until August 30th. FFS, is there anything they taught us in school that was accurate?

The volunteer fire department of the next town over from us, about three miles away, is having their annual fundraising carnival and fireworks shows. For reasons not spelled out, they’re having two fireworks shows, one on the 2nd and another on the 4th. Jane and I are lucky because we can sit on the rear hatch of our car in the driveway and get a pretty good view of the show, especially if the weather is clear (they shoot them up higher in clear weather.) And when it’s over, we close up the car and walked back to our front door. No need to drive there when we can see it well enough from home.

So how are you celebrating our nation’s decision to declare its independence from the Tyranny of England? Fireworks? Barbecue? Fireworks thrown into your barbecue? I advise against that. Exploitation of child labor to help carry out said barbecue? Happens all the time in this country, just like in some others. Speaking of which, did you know that there is a still-pending proposal for a Child Labor Amendment to the Constitution? It did not get immediate ratification, and a subsequent law passed by Congress to regulate labor, including the labor of children, met with the Supreme Court’s approval. But I’m not sure if that’s not quite the same thing. I wouldn’t be surprised if Republicans somewhere tried to deregulate child labor. Wait, I’m getting told in my ear that they already have, which is strange because I’m not wearing an earpiece and there’s nobody else in the room.

Anyway, have fun blowing shit up, but please, please, please be safe about it. In the meantime, may the Good Lord take a liking to you, and blow you up real soon.

June 26, 2016

Only The Fools Like Trump (a song parody)

Filed under: Parody — Tags: , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 10:30 PM

I don’t know if I’ve ever mentioned this before, but Donald J. Trump is in every conceivable way unfit to hold any public office, let alone the most powerful one in the country. He has zero comprehension of what the role of President of the United States is and seems to think the POTUS does nothing but negotiate deals all day. He doesn’t understand how the Constitution fits into governing and thinks he can just jail reporters who publish things he doesn’t like, such as the truth about him. If he was a reclusive billionaire who tried to stay out of the public spotlight, one could make an argument that printing things harmful to his image might be considered defamatory. Might. But Trump was a public figure of his own choosing and promotion long before he decided to play a joke on the country and pretend to run for president. He’s not really serious about being president, and it shows in the way he panics when pressed by reporters for real answers to questions like, “Are you serious?” and “How exactly will you make that happen?” and “Are you aware that’s totally unconstitutional?” His narcissism won’t let him admit failure of any kind, and so he continues along this ill-chosen path. And millions of fools are right behind him, urging him on, which only makes the problem worse. A pathological lying narcissist won’t go away if you keep paying attention to him.

Only The Fools Like Trump
Original words and music, “Only The Good Die Young” by Billy Joel 1977
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider 2016

Come out my minions, don’t hesitate
You pathetic fools learn much too late (more…)

June 25, 2016

Texit Is No Brexit

Filed under: Commentary — Tags: , , , , , — Wayne A. Schneider @ 11:27 AM

Great Britain stunned the world when a referendum on whether or not to leave the European Union resulted in the Leave forces winning. The EU’s reaction was to say, “Fine, then let’s get it over with as quickly as possible,” with the word “quickly” meaning “following a two-year negotiation”. This has spurred Danial Miller, of a group called the Texas Nationalist Movement, to push their own bid to secede from the Union, which they are cleverly (not really) dubbing “Texit.” Here’s the problem with it: It won’t mean anything. Unilateral attempts to secede from the Union are unconstitutional, according to a SCOTUS decision handed down in 1869. In it, the Court said a state cannot unilaterally secede. They must either achieve their goal through revolution (like the Civil War) or with the consent of Congress (which won’t ever happen.) I can think of several reasons why Texit is a bad idea, but that’s only because unlike the people in favor of this movement, (more…)

June 18, 2016

Can Tiny Hands Handle The Presidency?

A Super PAC calling itself “Americans Against Insecure Billionaires with Tiny Hands” released this video asking if someone could be President with tiny hands.

The group originally wanted to call itself, “Trump Has Tiny Hands,” but were told by the FEC that they had to change it because the “committee does not appear to be an authorized committee of that candidate,’ and therefore cannot use his name in the PAC’s name. An understandable rule considering what people would do if they could. I know what I would do if I could. “Americans Against Donald Trump’s Bigotry, Racism, Misogyny, Homophobia, Xenophobia, Fraud, Mendacity, and General Sleaziness.” My first ad would feature, of course, kittens. I hope the group is able to get its ad spread around, and I encourage you to share this post to help that endeavor.

People like Donald Trump need to be (more…)

June 13, 2016

June 13 – This Day In History

Filed under: Commentary — Tags: — Wayne A. Schneider @ 12:06 AM

When you get right down to it, many things in history happened on any given date on the calendar. But today I’m going to discuss just a few of the many important (and unimportant) things that happened on various June 13ths throughout history. Without further ado, on this date in:

1633: The charter for Maryland is given to Lord Cecil Baltimore after whom, of course, the city of Silver Springs, Maryland is named.

1731: Future First First Lady (more…)

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