Pick Wayne's Brain

July 8, 2010

Down in the Foxhole

I truly believe the trio on “Fox & Friends” are doing the nation a huge disservice. Oh, sure, they’re entertaining because they don’t know what they’re talking about. But they’re dangerous because they work hard to convince their audience that they do know what they’re talking about. And their audience (as far as the ones they’re intending to reach) are not the type inclined to do their own fact-checking. For that they rely on Bill O’Reilly and Glenn Beck. Luckily for us there’s Newshounds (motto: “We watch FOX so you don’t have to.”) So I wrote this parody about the dimwits (and by “dimwits”, I mean Steve Doocy, Gretchen Carlson, and Brian Kilmeade, in case anyone thinks I’m being vague) on “Fox & Friends”. I hope you enjoy it. (And I thank you, Jane, for your help.)

Down in the Foxhole
Original words and music “Down on the Corner” by John Fogarty,
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider

Early in the mornin’, just about breakfast time
Over on the Fox set, they’re startin’ with no minds
Three dips on the TV, tryin’ to stir you up
Rupert picks a theme out and they all begin to harp

Down in the Foxhole, out comes deceit
Gretchy and the Dumb Boys are spinnin’
Keep it simple, tap the heat

Brian hits the stupid, and people just got to smile
Gretchy pumps a gut check and she poses for a while
Doocy twangs the silly out, it’s all that he can do
And Rupert does his song and dance, shows us Hooters, too

Down in the Foxhole, out comes deceit
Gretchy and the Dumb Boys are spinnin’
Keep it simple, tap the heat

Down in the Foxhole, out comes deceit
Gretchy and the Dumb Boys are spinnin’
Keep it simple, tap the heat

You don’t need a brain cell just to hang around
But if you got an inkling won’t you say your piece aloud
Over in the Foxhole there’s a sappy noise
People tune in all around to watch the Tragic Boys

Down in the Foxhole, out comes deceit
Gretchy and the Dumb Boys are spinnin’
Keep it simple, tap the heat
(repeat and fade…)

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3 Comments

  1. Gretchy pumps a gut check and she poses for a while

    Hee hee, I love your stuff, Wayne. And your song parodies are kewl!! 😉

    You’re on a roll lately, hun. Keep up the great work!!

    Cross post on the Zoo anytime — you know that!

    Comment by Zooey — July 8, 2010 @ 10:14 PM

  2. I saw your comment on Welcome Back to Pottersville the other day where you mentioned that numerous political commentators should be put in “orange jumpsuits.” Guess you are not a First Amendment type.

    Comment by david — August 23, 2010 @ 2:28 PM

  3. Four years later this is still relevant…commentators/puppets have changed but the lies remain the same!

    Comment by Ebb — November 22, 2014 @ 11:22 PM


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