Pick Wayne's Brain

February 7, 2012

Bad Newt Rising

Well, we know that besides Callista, there’s at least one person smitten with Newt Gingrich, and that’s Sheldon Adelson, the multi-billionaire who’s been pouring money into a Super PAC that supports Newt. Early on in his book tour presidential run, Newt promised to run “a positive campaign.” But if you’ve listened to him lately, his old, nasty, vindictive self has been rising to the surface once again. This is the same guy who likes to throw the word “radical” at his opponents, not because it fits, but because it’s one of the “contrasting words” that Newt suggested GOP candidates use when talking about their opponents (see the GOPAC memo here), but who also proposed that they fire all but the “Master Janitor” in poor schools and pay the kids to keep their schools clean because it would teach them what earning a paycheck is like. Note that he didn’t propose this idea for rich kids going to school, who likely never saw a parent break a sweat at a job in their lives, only the poor kids. Oh, and proposing a colony on the Moon by the end of his second term isn’t radical? I can tell you why that would never work in one word: Water.

Bad Newt Rising
Original words and music by John Fogarty. Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2012

I see a bad Newt arising.
I see subtle all the way.
I see girth makes him fright’ning.
I see sad times today.

Don’t let him ‘round tonight,
Well he’s bound to change his wife,
There’s a bad Newt on the rise.

I hear (more…)

July 8, 2010

Down in the Foxhole

I truly believe the trio on “Fox & Friends” are doing the nation a huge disservice. Oh, sure, they’re entertaining because they don’t know what they’re talking about. But they’re dangerous because they work hard to convince their audience that they do know what they’re talking about. And their audience (as far as the ones they’re intending to reach) are not the type inclined to do their own fact-checking. For that they rely on Bill O’Reilly and Glenn Beck. Luckily for us there’s Newshounds (motto: “We watch FOX so you don’t have to.”) So I wrote this parody about the dimwits (and by “dimwits”, I mean Steve Doocy, Gretchen Carlson, and Brian Kilmeade, in case anyone thinks I’m being vague) on “Fox & Friends”. I hope you enjoy it. (And I thank you, Jane, for your help.)

Down in the Foxhole
Original words and music “Down on the Corner” by John Fogarty,
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider

Early in the mornin’, just about breakfast time
Over on the Fox set, they’re startin’ with no minds
Three dips on the TV, tryin’ to stir you up
Rupert picks a theme out and they all begin to harp

Down in the Foxhole, out comes deceit
Gretchy and the Dumb Boys are spinnin’
Keep it simple, tap the heat

Brian hits the stupid, and people just got to smile
(more…)

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