Pick Wayne's Brain

February 17, 2018

Russian Lass

By now everybody should know that Donald Trump, Jr., met with Russian lawyer Natalia Veselnitskaya to discuss the lifting the economic sanctions imposed on Russian banks and oligarchs by then-current-President Barack Obama for interfering with our elections, which everybody also knows they did. Except, apparently, the now-current-President Donald J. Trump, who says that when Putin said he didn’t interfere with our elections, he believed Putin believed what he said. Trump forgot what Putin used to do for a living before maneuvering to become Russian Dictator For Life. (Do you think he ever intends to spend another day not in complete control of his fate?) Now, Junior claims the meeting was about Russian adoptions, but don’t believe that for a moment. In retaliation for the sanctions, Putin banned Americans from adopting Russian babies. So the Russian Lass was there to discuss Putin’s lifting of the adoption ban if Trump would lift the economic sanctions. And Junior’s own emails reveal that the meeting was set up on the premise that the Russians (who, he was told, were working to help Trump get elected) had damaging information on Hillary Clinton. Though Trump claims he knew nothing about the content of that meeting (or that it was happening in the very building in which he sat), within days he was on the campaign trail encouraging the Russians to find Hillary’s missing emails. And Special Counsel Robert Mueller knows all of this, and more.

Oh, BTW, for those who believe the investigation into the Russian interference in our elections began with the “bogus Steele Dossier,” let me enlighten you to a few facts. The FBI knew what the Russians were up to long before Christopher Steele gave them his report because the Dutch, who had been spying on the Russians and literally watched them hack into the DNC’s servers, told them so. Then there was Trump Foreign Policy Team member George Papadopoulos who told an Australian diplomat the Russians had dirt on Hillary Clinton. This was before well-respected British former spy Christopher Steele came to the FBI with information he independently uncovered showing the Russians were trying to influence our elections, and the Trump campaign team was involved somehow. And despite Trump’s official claims that there was “no collusion” between his campaign team and Russia, the FBI recorded NSA Director-nominee Michael Flynn (who was fired by Obama for being untrustworthy, which he warned Trump about when they met) talking to Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak about lifting the sanctions. Before they were in office. Which is highly illegal. So Trump is lying. It’s impossible to actually believe he knew nothing about what was discussed at a meeting with Junior, son-in-law Jared Jushner, and campaign manager Paul Manafort (who was hired for his connections to Russia, as were many of the people in Trump’s campaign, as well as his involvement with money laundering with Donald Trump, and who is cooperating with Mueller.) Why would Junior not tell him about it, even if to say the Russians couldn’t deliver what they promised, even though they were already doing it? And why would Trump start encouraging the Russians to keep hacking if he didn’t know they were doing it? When Trump claims, “There was no collusion, no collusion,” there is video of him colluding with the Russians. Trump is screwed. And not just from Mueller. New York State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman is investigating the Trump Organization’s involvement with all those Russian mobsters buying up Trump properties at ridiculously high prices. And Trump has no authority to pardon anyone for violating New York State laws. If Trump tries to fire Mueller, look for Schneiderman to announce charges against Kushner. Jared owes a bank over a billion dollars, and the note is due soon.

Now that you have some of the background, please enjoy this parody of Styx’ “Renegade.”

Russian Lass
Based on “Renegade” by Styx
Original words and music by Tommy Shaw, © 1978
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, © 2018


Oh, Donald, I’m in fear for our lives from the long harm that you’ve brought
Lawman has put an end to your conning and you’re so far from alone
Oh Donald I can hear you lyin’, you’re so scared and not alone
Dang, Man, it’s comin’ down to the wire and you don’t have very long

The jig is up, the news is out
You’re totally guilty
The Russian lass with dirt to pass
Deceived for her country
(more…)

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March 5, 2017

Donald Trump TV Star (A Rock Opera Parody)

This is a work of fiction based on a work of fiction which, in turn, was based on another work of fiction. The characters are based on real people who may or may not behave the way they’re depicted here, but it would be fun to think they do. This is also a work of fantasy. The real procedures that would have to take place are different, but let’s allow a little license so we can have fun. Besides, I’m just trying to make my made-up story more closely match the made-up story upon which this is based, which tried to more-or-less match the made-up story on which it was based. You can just think of it as “fake news” right up until it really happens.

In researching the lyrics to the musical I found that several versions exist. This is from the one I grew up listening to and the one you want to go by. Its cover looks like this:
jcs-cover-2

I hope you enjoy it and if you do, please share it with your friends through the various media available. Warning: Not suitable for work. Void where prohibited by law.

                        DONALD TRUMP TV STAR
                           A Rock Opera Parody


CAST, The singers in order of appearance

REINCE PRIEBUS........................................WHITE HOUSE CHIEF OF STAFF
DONALD J. TRUMP............................POTUS, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
KELLYANNE CONWAY..........................................COUNSELOR TO THE POTUS
MICHAEL PENCE........................VPOTUS, VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
MITCH McCONNELL...........................................SENATE MAJORITY LEADER
RUDY GIULIANI..........................................................NOSFERATU
JOHN ROBERTS..................................CHIEF JUSTICE OF THE UNITED STATES
JARED KUSHNER.....................DONALD J. TRUMP'S CLOSE ADVISER and SON-IN-LAW
PAUL RYAN................................SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES
RUTH BADER GINSBURG................................................NOTORIOUS RBG 


Reince Priebus is worried.  He's beginning to think his boss might possibly be out
of his mind.  He talks to his dead father a lot, and he seems to think he's Jesus
Christ.  Reince is concerned about the kind of message his governance is sending.

                    HATRED ON THEIR MINDS
Reince Priebus:     My mind's in terror now--
                    At last all too well
                    I can see where we all soon will be
                    If you step away, the width of the plan
                    That you'll see's clearly all lunacy

                    Donald!
                    You've started to believe
                    The things you say you'll do
                    You really do believe
                    This kind of job's for you
                    And all the stuff you've done
                    You thought was swept away
                    Will begin to matter more
                    Than the things you say

                    Listen, Donald, I don't like what I see
                    All I ask is that you listen to me
                    And remember--
                    I've been a right-wing lad all along (more...)

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