Pick Wayne's Brain

June 30, 2011

See Our Best

Well, it looks like the Republicans are putting together another unexciting field of candidates. According to a recent poll, the candidate that Republican voters were most excited about, by 67%, was “None.” In honor of the Republican Candidates for president, I present this song, based on another Disney classic, “Be Our Guest”, from “Beauty and the Beast.” (Another of my personal favorites.)

See Our Best
Original words and music “Be Our Guest” by Howard Ashman and Alan Menken
Additional lyrics by Wayne A. Schneider, 2011

REINCE PRIEBUS (SPOKEN):
Ladies and gentlemen, it is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure that we welcome you tonight. And now we invite you to relax, let us pull up a chair as the GOP proudly presents…

Your winner!

REINCE PRIEBUS:
See our best! See our best!
Put our viewpoints to the test.
Tie a mike around our neck, and see
That we are not in jest.
Kooks for sure, anti-gay,
Anti-anything you say
Try the hate stuff, it’s malicious,
So deceiving and so vicious
We’re right wing in our stance
After all, this isn’t France!
And a winner here is never second-guessed
Go on, behold our venue
Crap your pants and then you’ll
See our best!
Gee, our best?
See our best!

REINCE PRIEBUS & CANDIDATES:
Big snafu, what we say
Goes unhidden on display

REINCE PRIEBUS:
You’ll despair our nerve to dare
What luminaries have to say
We alone can be paired
With the news that’s kept you scared
No one’s booming or just gaining
While the tax rates have been reigning
We tell folks we get kicks
From our business bag of tricks

GERMANS:
Und they march in perfect step
That you can bet

REINCE PRIEBUS & CANDIDATES:
Come on, our grasping class
Just wants its own free pass
To be our best

REINCE PRIEBUS:
If we’re pressed,
It’s fine whining we express

REINCE PRIEBUS & CANDIDATES:
See our best!
See our best!
See our best!

REINCE PRIEBUS:
Lies are not perturbing to a person so disturbing
There’s a hole within his soul to call upon
Ah, those “good old days” when we were truthful
Happily those good old days are gone
For years we’ve been trying
Seeding so much doubt with lying
Needing expert thieves to help us write our bills
Most days we don’t bother with the hassle
Crabby, batshit crazy
You looked in and oops-a-daisy!

MRS. PELOSI:
It’s their best, it’s their best
Sakes of Christ, they think they’re blessed
I’m so bored but thank the Lord
They’re with their flag pins neatly dressed
With debate, you can see
That they’re blind as blind can be
While we Dems do our boo-hooin’
There’ll be trouble in what they’re doing
They’ll do harm, stoke ‘em hot
Heaven’s sakes, was that a shot?
Listen up, they want the country in distress
They’re not a lot that’s new
Is it one chump or two?
For it’s their best!

REINCE PRIEBUS & CANDIDATES:
They’re our best!

MRS. PELOSI:
It’s their best!

REINCE PRIEBUS & CANDIDATES:
They’re our best
See our best
See our best
Our right hand is on our breast
For ten years now we made lots of money here
And we’re obsessed
With our zeal, with our sleaze
Yes, indeed, the Kochs we please
While the campaign fight’s still going
We can’t help our ugly showing

Coarse, of course, and no fun
‘Til you shout, “Enough you’ve won!”
Then we’ll bring you up to speed on our success
Our fights we know you’ll eat up
While ourselves we beat up
See our best!
See our best!
See our best!
Please, see our best!

Cross-posted at The Zoo

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1 Comment

  1. Sakes of Christ! This isn’t France! Love this, Wayne … !

    Comment by lass o delight — June 30, 2011 @ 10:00 PM


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